Rats raise the trophy!
Goodbyes, Flights, and the full colorful recap of a successful 20th anniversary Rats tournament is all that's left for Jakarta.
Posted from Jakarta, Indonesia
Goodbyes, Flights, and the full colorful recap of a successful 20th anniversary Rats tournament is all that's left for Jakarta.
Jakarta Day 2 and the gang is all here.
In the middle was a run rule 19-2 against Saigon.
Most importantly the Rats posted an impressive 30 man line for post game handshakes. Prompting the opposition question "You guys leave anyone back in Singapore?". It's our 20th year. Leave no man behind.
Posted from Jakarta, Indonesia
Posted by HSL Oliver
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Day 1 and the rain came...
Half way into day 1 and the rats put up 7 runs against the HK Turkeys/GHG team for a 7-1 win. Good start to the tourney just before the rain started to pour down. Another game to play and a long wait ahead with plenty of cold beer. Let's hope we can see straight when the rain delay ends.
Posted from Jakarta, Indonesia
Posted by HSL Oliver
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Rats Win & Don’t Lose
This past Sunday the River Rats attempted to play a pair of games versus our arch-rivals, the Fattboyz. Owners of the league’s best record, the Fattboyz squad boasts several important attributes (like power, timely hitting, etc.) which have been in less readily abundant supply for the Rats in recent weeks. Would this be the week the team pulled its collective head out of its collective … hole in the ground?
Oddly enough, yes! In Game One the Rats combined sharp defence with ‘just-enough’ hitting to prevail 4-2. In fact, the Rats could have scored far more runs in this game had we not stranded 11 base runners in 6 innings of play.
Game Two started poorly, with the evil and pernicious Fattboyz spraying liners in every direction en route to plating 10 runs in the first inning. However, with the score 12-2 and the Rats preparing to mount an exceptionally awesome come back, the heavens opened up and the game was rained out after 4 innings, lead to the day’s ‘non-loss’.
So, while the game doesn’t count in the standings, we will include the batting results here in order to humiliate the participants.
From Best to “Non-Best”
* Mumbles: 1 for 1, 1.000, RBI
* "Kirsten" Scott Thomas: 3 for 4, .750, HR, Run, K, RBI
* Chad “I Got It” Garcia: 3 for 4, .750, Run
* Ronbo Bacher: 2 for 3, .667, 2 Sac, 2 RBI
* Sammy Kardon: 2 for 4, .500, Run, K
* Unka Steve: 2 for 5, .400, Run
* James "Feast or Famine" Stanczak: 2 for 5, .400
* Greg "Tough Love" Parker: 1 for 4, .250, BB, Run, K
* Alex Kost: 1 for 4, .250
* PHat: 1 for 4, .250, K, 2 RBI
* Mark Bennick: 0 for 2, 0.000, BB, Run, K
* Benedict Tan: 0 for 5, 0.000, K
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Lazy Scribe Wastes Week, Scrambles to Create Minimal Output
Last Sunday the Brewerkz River Rats played a pair of games versus our arch-rivals the Fattboyz.
Game One was punctuated by a distinct lack of hitting prowess, abetted by a propensity to hit a foul ball with two strikes for a stinky foul-out K. This happened four times, folks so there must’ve been something in the air that day. Somehow, despite this, the Rats managed to push across 7 runs, which was only half the total of our evil-worshipping yet oddly svelte opponents.
Game Two showed a much stronger offensive attack and in the correct sense of the term. After the Ras scored thrive in the top of the first, strong defense held the Fattboyz to solo runs in the first three frames. Then, the Rats blew the game open, scoring 7 in the fourth and a further 4 in the fifth inning, en route to a comfortable 14-8 victory.
Of course, no Rats performance would be complete without some kind of dumbass injury. This week’s installment featured PHat’s right hamstring becoming pulled. Which was ironic given that he’d actually stretched in the morning for the first time in months. Moral of the story – don’t stretch before games!
Top Hitters: Collin Toh (5 for 7 with a BB) and Erik “Mr.” Anderson (4 for 6).
Un-Top Hitters: "Kirsten" Scott Thomas (1 for 7, 2 Ks!) and Mumbles Vertlieb (1 for 5, BB, K)
Meh Hitters: Everyone else
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Blecchhh!
With a title like that, see if you can guess how the River Rats did this past weekend in a pair of games versus our arch-rivals, the Hawks. It’s taken me the entirety of the week to work up the energy to bang out a game post pathetic enough to match the Rats’ on-field effort. Here goes nothin’…
Game One: In his first game back from his sojourn in Manila, Ronbo Bacher hit a triple to lead off the second inning and came in to score on PHat’s sac fly. Aside from a pointless run in the 7th inning, this was the extent of the Rats’ offense. Solid defence (with sterling play from Collin Toh and “Unka” Steve Kreutter on the left side of the infield) kept the Hawks off the scoreboard until the bottom of the 6th inning when they scored 4 runs. But when you only muster 7 hits in 31 at bats (.286 average) plus a solitary walk, you pretty much have a recipe for suckage: Loss 4-2.
Game Two: A lineup shakeup produced more hits and runs but no different outcome. Showing a genius for leaving runners stranded, the Rats turned 11 hits (in 33 at bats, .333 average) and 6 walks into a meagre 3 runs. Naturally we allowed 7 runs in. The only hits of note were Sam Kardon’s booming double over the center fielder and Rat newby Nick Desanto’s double to left. There weren’t even any Pink Hats to result in beers with which to drown our sorrows! Sigh.
I blame Coach Vertlieb. And you can, too, in the comments section below.
Hitting “Star”
* PHat: 3 for 6, .500; BB, Sac, Run
Hitting Half-Stars
* Nick Desanto: 4 for 9, .444
* Ronbo Bacher: 3 for 7, .429; BB, 2 Runs
Hitting Quarter-Stars
* Unka Steve: 2 for 6, .333; 2 BBs, Run; excellent defence
* Collin Toh: 3 for 9, .333; excellent defence
* Sam Kardon: 2 for 7, .286; BB, 2 Runs
Executive Blowers of Chunks
* Erik “Mr.” Anderson: 1 for 8, .125
* Mark Bennick: 0 for 6, BB
* Benedict Tan: 0 for 6, BB
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20 Years of THE RIVERRATS- Jakarta Hotel
Guys:It's time to start booking your hotel rooms for Jakarta. Attached provides all the information you need to book your hotel room. Once you have done so please let me know by sending me a short e-mail. Like I'm booked and your dates of arrival and departure.You should contact either one of the following people to book your roomArio Santoso <ario@atletcentury.com>;ThanksHarrisMobile: +65-9653-9726ThanksHarrisMobile: +65-9653-9726
Posted by Harris Vertlieb
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Rats Go Undefeated in Afternoons on Days Beginning with an “S”, Go Undefeated on Coin Flips and Bring Home Some Hardware, Baby!!
This past weekend saw the Brewerkz River Rats return to the fields of Southeast Asia international tourney softball in typical, if not fine, form. As has been the case for the past 19 years, the Pangaea Cup served as the backdrop to glory. The 19th edition, however, took place in a new location, the former US air force base Clark. And, as befits an airfield that saw many fighters and bombers soar off into the wild blue yonder full of hope only never to return having been shot down in flames, pulped, shredded, munched, folded, spindled and/or mutilated, the Rats performed not dissimilarly to our heroic-but-fallen compatriots of yore.
Mumbles and PHat arrived a day early to survey the scene and pronounced the beer cold, the hotel mattresses lumpy and the gnocchi excellent. Indeed, so far so good.
Then— suddenly! Dramatically!! Things … began … to … happen!
First – other Rats and, in fact, other teams began to arrive in Clark. The Rats put in a strong showing at the Thursday evening coaches meeting, especially in the environs of the buffet line of crudités, hors d’oeuvres, munchies, small bites, and, of course, the inevitable snacks. Also there was beer. Cold beer. Lots of cold beer.
After an evening of light-hearted frivolity, highlighted by a three-way Parcheesi death match between Hong Kong Turkey-turned-Rat-for-the-weekend Mike Hutchinson, Peter “I Gotta Buy a Last Name” Frank, and local boy Matt Brill. All three lost.
The ensuing morning saw the Rats assemble at the hotel staging area, looking calm and rested and ready for the arduous 10- maybe 12-minute air-conditioned minivan ride to the fields. Debarking from said conveyance upon arrival at the Parade Ground fields, outfielder Kenneth Kaufman, doing his best impression of Will Smith doing his best impression of Muhammad Ali, screamed "The champs are here, the champs are here," to no one in particular. Oddly enough, those words were to prove prescient, if only because our arrival meant that all teams were, in fact, at the fields. Well played, sirrah!
Game One for the Rats was vs. the Meralco team, featuring a pitcher who throws the same damn unhittable unlimited arc high pitch against us every year. After a crisp and professional well-nigh crushing victory in the coin toss event, the Rats took the field and promptly surrendered 4 runs. Undismayed, the Rats put up a pair of runs in the bottom of the first and second innings to tie the game at 4 apiece. That joyous time proved to be short-lived however, as Meralco plated 5 further runs in the next three frames to take a 9-5 lead. But, after trading further solo runs, the Rats surrendered meekly by the final score of 10-6.
Highlights of this game included FOUR, count’em, four K’s, so there was plenty of beer in the dugout to refresh us for Game Two courtesy of Max Suderow, PHat, Matt Brill & Mike “Hutch” Hutchinson. Despite these offensive anti-heroics, the Rats batted their tourney game-high .553 (21 for 38), including a 4-4 from Eric “Mr.” Anderson and a 3-3 from Mumbles Vertlieb, while only one Rat did not hit safely. There were no walks, no sac flies, no double plays and no extra base hits by the Rats in this game (yes, that means 21 singles!). So, how did the Rats manage to score so few runs? 11 runners LOB. Oophh! Body blow!!
And, lest your scribe be accused of favoritism, let it hereby be recorded that PHat either (a) gave it his all in the absence of input from the third base coach by attempting to score from second on a ball hit to the outfield, or (b) is a total moron for not assuming that the base coach’s studied indifference to providing any information whatsoever was actually a signal to discontinue forward progress. Bill “Sport Playa” Lafferandre has already voted on this subject, selecting (c) “JACKASS”. Cast your vote in the Comments section below!
Having successfully cooled their bats in the second half of Game One, the Rats kept up that torrid pace in Game Two versus the Tokyo Cocobay Stingrays by authoring three 3-‘n-outs in the first six innings, counterbalanced by a pair of gently scored runs. The opposition, of course, scored early and often.
Not helping the cause was Rats left fielder Peter “I Gotta Buy a Last Name” Frank who taunted the Stringrays man-mountain catcher, nicknamed ‘Cutie Pie’. Said pie of not inconsiderable cuteness promptly went 4-4 in the game, hitting ball after ball over Peter’s own not-especially fetching head. "I stopped encouraging Peter about two outs into the second inning," remarked left-center fielder Tramer Ray. “But Peter, y’know, he’s not too bright.”
Once again, the team batted a respectable .424 (14 for 33) on the game and had NO strikeouts. Only one batter failed to hit safely and PHat went 2-2 with a BB and had an enormously satisfying to watch strikeout of the opposition’s #5 batter on a pitch tossed 30-40 feet high. Max and Stacy Fender also had multi-hits plate appearances, and Tramer & Max both homered, with the latter one coming on a towering fly ball to medium-depth center field in the second inning that was badly mis-played by the opposition.
Showing the kind of alacrity and, dare we say, spunk Max scampered around the bases. "BOOM," yelled Max, crossing his hands in front of his midsection in the universal ‘Suck It’ sign, and excitedly greeted team mates on the bench with ecstatic chest bumps. "Seemed like an overreaction to me. He should act like he's been there before. Kid is so ugly," remarked third base coach Sport Playa Lafferandre.
(Of course Max got his comeuppance a few frames later when he misjudged a line drive to right and watched the ball dribble all the way to the fence. There are rumors that Stingray players expounded some "BOOM" comments of their own as Max was forced to run after the ball.)
Otherwise, the defense largely looked solid but unspectacular with one GLARING exception: Verlieb. Forced into playing third base for the first time since Pangaea Two (The Wrath of Khan), Mumbles kept the game close with some acrobatic plays, particularly a highlight reel-calibre reaction play on a line drive ticketed to left field. "My hand hurts," mumbled Mumbles. "But like a true hero of mine once said, 'A champion is someone who gets up, even when he can't,' or was it 'We fall so we can get back up'? No that was Alfred from Batman. Stick with the first quote. Can you cut that second line, please?"
Much like those heroes about whom Vertlieb was referring, the Rats, with the game looking out of reach, mounted a comeback. "Never say die," squeaked Rats catcher Charlie “Anybody Need a Vowel?” Gaetjens, donning a rally cap and popsicle, and cheering for his team mates.
By virtue of having won the coin toss again, the Rats batted as the home team and, down by a score of 10-2, with one out in the 7th batted seven consecutive men safely to bring the score to 10-7. Time and luck ran out, however, and the Rats’ rally died with the tying run at the plate.
Alas, the vowel-blessed Gaetjens sported a pouty look post-game and refused to take off his rally cap or even respond to questions when asked what the loss meant for the team. He also declined to state precisely where he “donned” the now-disappeared popsicle. “I have always hated that guy with a deep and abiding passion,” said Sport Playa.
The evening’s excitement came largely at the expense of Tramer’s right hand and elbow, where he non-electively decided to skid along the pavement of the main drag. Thus, henceforth, Tramer’s River Rat nickname shall be “Skidmark”! All hail Skidmark!!
Saturday morning saw the Rats once-again storm the fields like a pack of slavering armadillos hopped up on goofballs. Game Three was against our old friends the Taipei Kings. This being elder statesman and Asia softball legend Dan ‘Grinch’ Grindell’s final tourney, coupled with the fact that Grinch himself and several of the Kings players have played with the Rats in tourneys past, the affair was friendly and fun. Until, of course, the coin toss, whereupon the gloves came off. Continuing the team’s improbable run to coin toss glory, the Donnelly “Seriously, I Have My Passport This Time” Edmund kept the string alive with a commanding call of “TAILS”, where upon part time King player Devlin “The Details” Cotter mooned Grinch and yelled ‘Suck it, old man!’
(Sport Playa Lafferandre was so shocked by this outburst that he could only mutter “My stars and garters! Well, I never—” for the remainder of the contest.)
After the King and Rats traded runs in the first, the Kings plated a second in the second to take the lead. But the Rats brought home three runs of their own in the bottom of the third to take a 4-2 lead, capped by Kenneth "Don’t Call Me Ken" Kaufman’s gap-seeking liner that resulted in a round-tripper. That’s right. Your eyes are not, in fact, deceiving you. The Rats actually held a lead at some point during the weekend!
The Kings knocked in a pair in the top of the 4th to tie the game, but the Rats pulled one back in the bottom half of the frame to re-take the lead. Thus, against the top team in our bracket, the Rats held the Kings’ powerful bats to only 4 runs through 4 innings, aided in no small part by strong play in right field by Stacy and continued strong play at third by Mumbles.
Regrettably, the Kings then scored three in the 5th while the Rats went hitless over the final three innings to lose a heart breaker 7-5.
Aside from Don’t Call Me Ken’s shot, the Rats did bupkis multiplied by diddly squat raised to the power of nada at the plate. I mean, dude – the team batted .290 (9 for 31)! But we did score our second walk of the tourney, courtesy of Donnelly.
On the bright side, we turned 9 hits and one BB into 5 runs. On the somewhat less bright side we’re averaging a crummy 6 runs a game through three games. And we had the $%@*! coin tosses working for us, too, goldurnit!
But much like Mitt Romney’s position on, well on pretty much anything, the Rats’ luck soon pivoted. By quirk of fate our final round robin opponent was a Philippine Air Force team, which in fear of an imminent attack from Timor Leste, was called up to active duty and was therefore unavailable to play softball. Upon learning that we now stood 1-3 by virtue of the air force forfeit, the Rats proceeded to party like we’d just won the World Series. No pitcher of margaritas was too tall. No plate of nachos too greasy. No cooler full of beer was too <ummm, something>. We drank and ate it all.
Amidst all of this it was decided that maybe softball wasn’t really our thing. So we took up archery. (Yes, gentle reader, once again your eyes are not deceiving you. ARCHERY.) And for a sum of money I’m not sure anyone remembers, we borrowed a bow and arrow set from the local color and shot .200 (2 for 10) at a plastic table set up maybe 50 feet away. I am pleased to report that no living creatures were harmed in this act and the plastic table’s next of kin have been notified.
Said Sport Playa, “Man, I just loves me my archery!!”
But we paid for all the carousing big time the next morning, when 75% of the outfield could barely stand.
Sunday morning featured a re-match with the Tokyo team we played on Friday. This was Game One of the Toilet Bowl playoffs. The Big Kahuna. What we’ve been playing for all weekend.
First: the coin toss. ANOTHER coin toss victory for the Rats! Stunning. Amazing. Utterly non-helpful through three games, would this prove to be the turnaround the team so desperately desired? In a word…
No.
In a game that critics and both fans who watched are insisting was not nearly as close as its outcome would lead some to believe, the Brewerkz RiverRats battled until the end, before eventually falling to a superior Stingray offensive attack.
After agreeing to afford the Stingray offence with a minimum of five outs per inning, through a combination of errors and walks, the Rats found themselves at a severe disadvantage.
The threat of a mercy rule loomed large as the Stingrays piled on the runs. The score was getting out of hand, with the Rats trailing 15-4 at one point. But, much like the original Thrilla in Manila, this game would come down to the wire, and, ultimately, could have gone either way, especially had the Rats managed to double their offensive output. Once again, though, the Rats found a way to battle their way back into the game in the final at bats, halving a 10-run deficit.
In the end, however, the effort stalled and the Rats were knocked out of the tournament 16-11. The Stingrays would go on to lose to Meralco in the Toilet Bowl championship by a score of 6-1.
“You can get bbq’d stingray at many of the local coffee sops in Singapore” said Sport Playa.
In a cruel, cruel twist of fate, the 11 runs the Rats scored in this loss would have won every other game we played this weekend. Sigh.
After the game, River Rats third baseman Harris Vertlieb was honored with the club division Gold Glove award. As part of his acceptance speech, Vertlieb was simultaneusly inspired and incoherent, mumbling through an account of his accolades, acknowledgments, regrets, life dreams and dinner plans. Speaking through his interpreter, Sport Playa, Mumbles concluded:
"Today I was the hero the Rats deserved, but not the one we needed. That's another Batman reference. Get it? WE'LL SEE YOU GUYS IN JAKARTA FOR RATS 20TH ANNIVERSARY. MAKE IT HAPPEN!!!" he concluded.
The River Rats returned to Singapore determined to come out stronger in May, and make a push for that hardware Coach Vertlieb is so determined to get.
Thanks to several transplants from other teams that were willing to play on the Rats and supplement our lineup. We couldn't have done it without you. 0-4 on the field probably reflects our 100-0 record in the bars. Congratulations again to Harris on his gold glove, and to Kenneth Kaufman on being home run king.
Thanks as always to wonderful tourney organizers and sponsors for making this event a reality. See y’all in Jakarta in 2 months!!
Hitting Air Marshals
* Mumbles: .600, 6 for 10, 2 runs; gold glove, broken hand
* Donnelly Edmond: .538, 7 for 13, BB, 2 runs; perforated lip & liver
Flight Squadron Leaders
* PHat: .500, 6 for 12, BB, K-batting, multiple Ks-pitching, run; slayer of Styrofoam cooler
* Stacy Fender: .500, 5 for 10, run; solid d in right, like they teach it in Portland
* David Dwight Dingwall: .500, 1 for 2; always nice to be seeing 3D!
Air Field Sweepers
* "Don’t Call Me Ken": .462, 6 for 16, 2 HRs, 4 runs; wasn’t called Ken all weekend
* Tramer “Skidmark” Ray: .429, 6 for 14, HR, K, 2 runs; earned his Rat nickname
* Erik "Mr." Anderson: .429, 6 for 14, 4 runs; place defense at second like no ever has before, or will again
Bomb Catchers
* Max Suderow: .400, 4 for 10, K, HR, 3 runs; sunny, cherubic disposition was a delight to behold
* Devlin "The Details" Cotter: .400, 4 for 10, 3 runs; provided key scouting intel in the game vs. Taipei
* Peter “I Gotta Buy a Last Name” Frank: .333, 5 for 15, 5 runs; monumentally hammered in left field on Sunday
* Charlie “Anybody Need a Vowel?” Gaetjens: .333, 2 for 6, run; caught pitches, with authority, in spite of existential crisis
Executive Blowers of Chunks
* Matt Brill: .200, 1 for 5, K, run; thanks for coming out, man!
* Mike “Hutch” Hutchinson: .200, 1 for 5, BB, K; unclear why we didn’t think of calling you Rabbit Hutch during the tourney. Our bad.
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RiverRats 20 Year Anniversary in Jakarta- May 17-20
It's been 20 Years since a bunch of Rag Tag second string ballplayers got together to create a new type of Softball Team. Over the years The Singapore RiverRats have come to be known as the team of special friendships!
Well we will be celebrating our 20th Anniversary this year and what no better place for it to be hosted than in our beloved Jakarta Indonesia at the Annual SEA Softball Tournament May 17-20. Come one come all to this glorious event to renew old friendships and make new ones.
Special events and awards will be given out. So let us know if you can make it or not and start the banter!!
Thanks
Coach Mumbles
Mobile: +65-9653-9726
Posted by Harris Vertlieb
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Shhhh!! Shhh, the Bats are Sleeping. The Poor Dears Need the Rest, So Hush Please!
Once again the mighty Brewerkz River Rats stormed the field at the Terror Club like a swarm of over-tired narcoleptic octogenarians. Our opponents on this occasion were our arch-rivals, the VBears.
The vicious and potently perfidious VBears lead off Game One by scoring a run in the top of the first to surge into a commanding lead. Undaunted, the Rats plated two runs of their own to unsurge the VBears surge and surgically surge their own insurgent surge to take their own commanding lead.
Thereafter a great deal of sucking occurred, proffered by both teams.
Suddenly – dramatically! The VBears pounced and scored a tying run in the top of the 5th inning. But after the first two batters flew out meekly to start the bottom of the frame, PHat poked a single, setting off a two-out rally of singles that brought in five runs and restored the Rats’ lead. The singlers being: Sport Playa, Chuck, Mumbles, Collin, & Sammy.
Strong pitching from Erik Anderson “Cooper 360” and even stronger defense from the Rats kept the VBears in check and the Rats came away with a 7-4 victory.
After a remarkably beer-free intermission the Rats resumed their previously scheduled sucking, albeit now with more base runners being left to die on the vine. Sadly the team’s Game Two streak of plating the leadoff hitter only came to an end in the 4th inning when the leadoff hitter did not score, owing to the fact that he came nowhere near to reaching base safely.
The VBears appeared to take affront at the Rats’ offensive ineptitude and, in a stunning display of oneupsmanship, eschewed scoring even a single run. They nearly blew their streak in the bottom of the 5th but only an über groovy, super-bitchin’ inning ending 3-6-1 double play (courtesy of Jeff “Kenny F. Powers” Gill, Collin Toh & PHat) kept the runner at third from scoring. Indeed, this play was so spectacularly amazing that, by solemn and universal accord, it will be spoken of only in hushed and reverential whispers in the weeks and months (well, days, maybe) to come.
Thusly inspired and whooping it up in the dugout the Rats immediately went quietly in the top of the 5th. But, after extending the lead to 4-0 in the 6th, the VBears accidentally posted a run of their own. But that proved to the end of the scoring, and the Rats came away with their second victory of the day.
Oh yeah – the bats got PLENTY of sleep on the day, as the team batted all of .344 on the day. Yipe! (Yet, oddly, no pink hats on the day.)
Tough Day On The Ranch
* Chad "I Got It" Garcia: 0.000, 0 for 6; top-5 all time lame ass throw from second to first base trying to turn a double play. (Then again, he was gimping around on a bad knee. Then again, you don’t throw the ball with your knee….)
Stepped in the Milk Bucket and Walked Straight Into the Barn Door
* Jeff “Kenny F. Powers” Gill: .167, 1 for 6 … and that hit came in his last at bat – whew!
* “Unka” Steve Kreutter: .167, 1 for 6, Run. Quoth the Unka “Yeah, but I got more hits than Chad and I scored more times than Gill. That’s gotta count for something right? Right? Right? Guys??”
* Andrew "Jethro" Tull: .200, 1 for 5. Had the lazy fly ball seriously working today!
* Bill "Sport Playa" Lafferandre: .200, 1 for 5. DH’d both games, but handled everything hit his way with aplomb, aplomb I tell you!
Got Punched By a Lil’ Dogie
* “Kirsten” Scott Thomas: .333, 2 for 6. Kept asking about the location of the casting couch while promising a ‘performance to remember’. (No one else understood it either.)
* Chuckmeister Chuckie Chuck from Chuckie-Con Five: .400, 2 for 5. Welcome to the Rats! Next time I’ll try to catch your last name! (Sorry, my bad.)
Rassled a Few Strays, Patrolled the Back Forty
* Sammy Vatrano: .500, 3 for 6, 2 runs. Forgot to call off Mumbles on a ball hit directly at him (Mumbles) which ended up … <see next entry>
* Harris “Mumbles” Vertlieb: .500, 2 for 4, run. While attempting to catch a ball hit squarely to him, performed a near-miraculous feat of pulling his glove down at the last possible instant and, instead of catching the ball, took it on the chin. Wow!
Ain’t No Bull Here
* Erik Anderson: .600, 3 for 5, BB. Proved to be eminently coachable, but the coach was too busy perfecting the disappearing glove & ball-to-chin trick craze that’s sweeping the nation.
* PHat: .600, 3 for 5, run. Era now infinitely worse than last week.
* Collin Toh: .600, 3 for 5, BB, 4 runs. Nearly outscored the opposition by himself. Yeah, but what have you done for us lately?
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